All Bodies are Good Bodies

When we say “all bodies are good bodies” we have to include our own.

This has never rang more true in my entire life! I’ve struggled with body image for so long, and having babies did not help the situation. But I have to remember, my body is AMAZING. My body held, protected, and birthed 3 babies!

And now, it has gone through a gallbladder surgery and still is taking care of me. It’s truly amazing how strong my body is and I’m so proud of all it’s been through!

The stretch marks, cellulite, stretched skin, “chub”, and now gallbladder scars just show how powerful I am and how much I’ve concurred. They don’t make me who I am. Although my body looks totally different than it was many years ago, life has changed and so has my body. That’s something I’m slowly becoming okay with. 🌻

A letter to the Stay-at-Home mom

Dear stay-at-home mom,

I see you.

I see you, waking up 5, 6, 10 times with your newborn who has her schedule messed up.

I see you, waking with the sun, with sleepy eyes, as you pour the first of many cups of coffee that will turn cold before you get a moment to drink them.

I see you, mom bun for the 3rd time this week because you haven’t had time to shower.

I see you, as your wild one throws another car at your head.

I see you, wanting to hold your newborn as much as you can because you know babies don’t keep.

I see you, trying your hardest to give all your love and attention to all your kids, while trying to juggle the housework at the same time.

I see you, serving lunch to your family only to sit down to a cold plate for yourself.

I see you, dressing defiant toddlers, wiping hands, faces, and bottoms all day long.

I see you, hiding in the bathroom as your children bang and kick the door because they have to show you something right that second.

I see you, sitting on the kitchen floor teaching your babes all about the world instead of doing the dishes that have continued to pile up.

I see you, cooking dinner while separating fighting children, only to not eat any yourself.

I see you, scared eyes as they jump off the couch for the 5th time today, because they’re being adventurers.

I see you, staring at the massive pile of laundry beckoning to be folded. But you know you won’t get to it for a couple more days.

I see you, stopping in the middle of sweeping to play playdoh because you know one day they won’t ask you to come play with them anymore.

I see you, kissing sleepy heads, tucking them in, reading stories and singing them to sleep.

I see you, getting them another glass of water and finally sinking into bed exhausted after a long day of doing so much, but feeling like you got absolutely nothing accomplished.

I see you, eyes weary, as you sit awake at night to get even 10 minutes to yourself.

I see you, keeping it all together when you feel like you’re falling apart.

I see you, loving this life and all the chaos involved. Never wanting it to change for even a second even though it’s the hardest thing you’ve ever done.

I see you, mama. Because I am you.

They’re watching you, Mama

Self-love has always been hard for me. Even as a kid, I would imagine being skinnier, prettier, smarter, taller. I always envied girls who I thought were all of those things.

Then, I had kids very young and back to back.

Droopy boobs, wider hips and a wider waist, streaks of stretch marks. It’s difficult having kids and watching as your body takes on a completely different form. But, that different form grew my beautiful babies for 9 months. My body went through all the growing pains, all the contractions, gave me my 2 babies, and continues to grow my third. Those stretch marks are my battle scars and a very small price to pay for what I gained in return.

Now that I have a daughter, a son, and another daughter on the way, how I talk about myself and my body in front of them is so important. Sure, I could pinch my thighs and wish they were smaller, I could stare at my widening hips in the mirror, I could cover up at the pool, or wear longer pants in the summer instead of shorts, I could say how “fat” I feel as my stomach continues to grow to make room for my third baby.

My children are like human sponges and soak up everything we say and notice when we’re unhappy. I’m sure if you have kids, you’ve noticed they’re the same way. They’re watching you, mama. They’re watching you as you stand in the mirror for hours poking and prodding all the excess skin that sags down. They’re watching as you change clothes for the 7th time because you don’t feel good enough in any of it. They’re watching as you wish to look like the other mom at the park that bounced back within weeks of having her baby.

So instead, celebrate those stretch marks! Put on that sexy dress that makes you feel like a million bucks. Tell yourself how beautiful you are. Our kids don’t need a perfect, skinny mom, they need a happy one; one that loves the woman she sees in the mirror. This isn’t all to say you can’t try to better yourself. Strive to be fit, eat healthier, go on walks, work out; but meet yourself where you are. Love yourself, your whole self, fully and completely, where you are and for who you are right now. Our positivity towards our bodies will rub off on those little girls and boys we’re raising to be strong and full of self-love!

My 10 New Year’s Resolutions

2019. I can’t even believe I’m saying that. 2018 was a whirlwind year for me and my family. We found out a lot about R and EJ’s personalities and health this year. I lost a baby, one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through. I’m so ready for 2019 to be a year of growth. 

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I make a few resolutions at the beginning of each year that aren’t very important, but this year is really going to stick. These 10 resolutions are very important to me and my growth. ❤️

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  1. Build my current friendships and meet new people
  2. Create and maintain a workout routine while also eating cleaner and healthier.
  3. ❤️ Love myself through everything ❤️
  4. Stop comparing myself and my life to others and to people on social media
  5. Be kinder and more patient
  6. Go to church every week and do my devotional everyday
  7. Stay steady in my faith
  8. Stop stressing the small stuff
  9. Be more grateful
  10. Drink more water

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A Letter to My Future Self:

Dear Future Self,

I hope you’ve let go of the small things that bother you about yourself, and found joy in how strong you are. I hope you haven’t dwelled on the little mistakes that you thought were the end of the world. 

I hope you have confronted your inner fears, smashed your insecurities, and let go of your doubts about your strengths and embraced them as well. I hope you have let go of the stress that used to build up and eat away at you.

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I hope you aren’t afraid of what people think of you, and love yourself no matter what they do think. I hope you’re embracing feeling vulnerable, making connections, tending to relationships, and looking for adventures.

I hope you have given all that you could to your family, your friends, and those you care for you, but not forgetting to take care of yourself.

I hope your dreams have come true, that you’ve lived life to the fullest and made the most of each day as you always said you would when you were younger.

I hope you feel confident that you’ve tried your best to be the best mom, despite a constant weight of ‘mom-guilt’, worry, and judgment that you put on yourself. I hope you have realized that you were just the mom your children needed.

I hope you continue to have a desire to learn and grow, to never stop figuring out how you can be a better version of yourself, and to help others see what they cannot.

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I hope you traveled and saw places in the world you thought you wouldn’t and made lasting memories with family and friends along the way. 

I hope you’ve stayed strong in your faith. I hope you’ve known He was there every step of the way and trusted that He had you in his hands, always.

Most of all, I hope you are happy with your life as you look back on all the beautiful memories. 

Until we meet, Future Self,

Me

Body positivity

Learning to love my body is probably one of the hardest things I’ve tried to accomplish and still work on daily. 

I go back and forth constantly on hating and loving my ever-changing body. Some days, I feel shame and embarrassment as I notice the marks and extra skin that has appeared since having my two babies. My body changed abruptly and I definitely did not snap back. Then, some days I have boosts of confidence. Whether it’s just a random moment, my husband compliments me, or I just realize how thankful I am for my body. 

Body positivity takes constant work. Some days are perfect, other days are rough, and some days are right in between. I just need to remind myself to give my body the love and appreciation it needs and deserves. I have moments of weakness, but I LOVE my body. It carried and nurtured my two beautiful children. I love what my body did for me. I love what my body continues to do for me. I love how strong my body is after all the changes and everything it’s been through.

If you struggle with your body image as well, I just want you to know that you are not alone! I struggle everyday and so do man women and mothers around me. That is okay! This is my safe place and I hope that everyone who encounters my page will feel the same way.